Family

Today is the anniversary of my deceased husband’s birth so I am writing a tribute to the unique spirit he was as a human.  He was born on Friday, July 13, 1928 under the sign of Cancer and would have been 90 years old today.  The number 13 was his lucky number.  Wikipedia gives the following horoscope information about Cancer.

 

It is the 4th House in the Zodiac.  The Latin motto is Genitor with the translation of parent.  The modern title is House of Home and Family.  The interpretation is Ancestry, heritage,  roots.  Early foundation and environment.  Mother of mothers as figure.  The caretaker of the household.  Comfort.  Cyclic end of matters.

 

When I read the above description about Cancer, I thought how perfectly that description fit his life.  He was a man who loved his birth home, his Mother, Father, his brothers, as well as his children and his married home.  At times, he was a Mother to his children.  He was the caretaker of the household and the comforter for his family as long as they needed him.  As a Los Angeles Police Officer, he was a caretaker and comforter of humanity, of those who were lost and needed assistance.  He had many businesses on the side while working for the Police Department.  He was a handyman with many skills for fixing things around and in a home.  He loved working and being busy.  He had a sense of when cycles were to end, when it was time to retire from the Police Department, when it was time to sell his business, when it was time to move, when it was time to stop working, stop driving, and when it was time to leave his body on June 3, 2014.

 

He was a simple man, with great love for his country, serving as a Military Policeman in the US Army, for his fellow officers, for his workers, for his neighbors, and for anyone who needed assistance.  He loved the outdoors, whether it was working in the yard, going hiking, water-skiing, or travel to domestic and foreign lands.  He was an explorer interested in what the next idea, invention, road, highway, town, state, or country would open for him.

 

In many ways he was a shy man, not one to talk a lot, but when he spoke, others listened.  He had a way of observing life without talking about it that was revealing as a spiritual practice.  He was very clear about the reasons he did not like some people.  He did not often change his mind.

 

He was a person most everyone liked immediately as he had a presence about him that drew one; he knew who he was.  He was a tall man, 6’4″, weighed 210 lbs., had a good build, and was handsome with beautiful skin.  He was a man’s man and a gentleman.  Women were attracted to him.  He chose his body well for the spiritual lessons he would learn in his life, for the choices he would make in all areas, and for the legacy he would leave.

 

His favorite times were with family and friends in our home with food and conversation.  His heart was happy and his soul was at peace during these times.

 

He was a man of courage even when he was afraid.  There was a strength in him that overrode the fear.  One time when our car was being towed down a fairly steep hill, we watched as the car trailer begin to sway from one side of the freeway to the other pulling the tow vehicle with it, then both overturned on the side of the road.  He pulled in behind them, was out of the car instantly, ran to open the door to the overturned tow vehicle to see if they were alright and to assist them in getting out of the vehicle.  When we were discussing it later, I told him it made me sick to my stomach to see that.  He said it did him also.  He overrode his own feelings to assist the others, which was just one example in many for others to follow.

 

Each of us has Spirit guiding us and the opportunity to stay open and follow this guidance.  Spirit was so strong within him that he could withstand the many tests that came his way and stay the course.  Spirit guided his life so magnificently and still does.

 

Now that I have some distance from his passing and can see him more objectively as a man, on this his birthday, I honor the beautiful, loving, courageous Spirit he was in the human form, and is in Spirit form now.

 

Reggie sees him in Spirit form when he is around as he stares off into space following him.  He likes him better now that he is in Spirit form as he entertains Reggie and watches over him.  Nancy and Reggie♥

My parents were hard workers, created a lovely family, had good times and bad times, but were two people I was proud of.  I didn’t know it at the time, but it was so important for me to have someone to be proud of.  Spirit was laying the foundation for my life.

I like to know the precise meanings of words, so I checked on Wiktionary and found the following:

proud (comparative prouder or more proud, superlative proudest or most proud)

1. Gratified; feeling honored (by something); feeling satisfied or happy about a fact or event.

          I am proud of Sivu’s schoolwork.

2. Possessed of a due sense of what one is worth or deserves. quotations ▼

          I was too proud to apologize.

3. (chiefly biblical) Having too high an opinion of oneself; arrogant, supercilious. quotations ▼
4. Generating a sense of pride; being a cause for pride.

          It was a proud day when we finally won the championship.

5. (obsolete) Brave, valiant; gallant.
6. Standing out or raised; swollen.

          After it had healed, the scar tissue stood proud of his flesh.

7. (obsolete) Excited by sexual desire; (of female animals) in heat.
8. Happy, usually used with a sense of honor, as in “I’m so proud to have you in our town.” But occasionally just plain happy as in “I’m proud to see gas prices down.” This is a widespread colloquial usage in the southern United States.

I was so proud of, and for, them that they each created a life that was worthy of standing out, of being honored and raised up by the respect they had for themselves, by being individuals you could trust, by being examples to follow, be living true to themselves, and by loving unconditionally their families, friends, church, community, country, and God.

They weren’t perfect, nor am I, but they set the standard high and were dedicated to maintaining it.  When they made mistakes, big and small, with Spirit guiding them, they set about correcting themselves.

When I married a man with three children, I set some goals inside myself.  Technically they are my stepchildren; I call them my “chosen” children and do not use “step” in referring to them.  I committed to being the best I could with each of them in every situation.  I wanted to be someone they could count on, someone they could trust, someone they could respect, someone who was a good example, someone who was responsible, and someone who would love them unconditionally.

I wanted to be someone they could be proud of.

On Friday, June 22, 2018, I was interviewed about my two near death experiences by Robert Sharpe, Host of the Bite Radio, for the Bringing Inspiration To Earth Show.  Below is the link to the show page so you can go to the Archives, click on the show and listen if it calls to you.

http://www.blogtalkradio.com/biteradiome/2018/06/22/booked-trip-to-the-other-side-and-back-with-nancy-a-waldron

Before the show, I sent out emails, put it on my website and Facebook pages.  Then the day before I was to be on, I saw on Facebook where my son had sent it out to his group to let them know I would be on the radio.

I got tears in my eyes as I read the simple words:  “Mom is going to be on this show.”   I felt he was letting me know he was proud of me.  It touched me so deeply then and still does.

So few words written held such meaning for me.  They represented a lifetime of working to be someone he could be proud of.  It eased a place in me that I didn’t know I was holding.  I am so proud of him for being such a loving, generous, open, Spirit filled man.  He would not say he is Spirit filled, but I observe the many ways he allows Spirit to flow through him.  So, the flow of Spirit continues as I know he has worked hard to be someone for his sons to be proud of.

Such a beautiful reflection of Spirit working through each of my parents, through me, and through my son to let each of us know we are someone to be proud of.

Reggie is someone to be proud of as he eats every bite of his food, protects the house, loves on me and anyone who comes inside the door, makes sure he goes to the bathroom outside, gets groomed so he looks handsome, and keeps up his walking and running exercise.  Spirit guides him all of the time out of mischief and into bounding joy.  Nancy and Reggie♥

My Father crossed over in 1998, so every Father’s Day I remember and celebrate the Father and man he was.  He was a farmer who loved the Earth and all it provided.  He was a big man 6’4″ tall, a big frame and he weighed 220 or so pounds.  He was a gentle man for the most part.  He loved the land and the animals.  My first memories are of living on the farm with chickens, pigs, cattle, and fields of wheat or fresh plowed soil.  Each day was a work day, except Saturday afternoon and evening, and Sunday all day, the Lord’s Day.  When you live on a farm, your family is all there is to interact with and you are very close.  Each person had chores no matter how small we were as we learned to do something useful with our time.

 

My Father’s sister and brother and their families lived up the road from our farm, so there was more family around.  My Father’s parents lived in town about 10 miles from our farm.  There were aunts, uncles, cousins on my Father’s side and more aunts, uncles, and cousins on my Mother’s side, but only one of her brothers was close.  My Father taught me by his actions the value of family and how much they meant to him.

 

Some years later, we moved to Colorado and left the vast comfort of these family connections.  My Father had wanted to live by the mountains since he was a boy and was able to fulfill that dream.  He loved living by the mountains even though it meant he had to drive 165 miles to his farm.  It was especially hard on him physically and in all ways to be separated from us.  We would go out to the farm to stay in the summer to help with the harvest and all that went with that until we were in our teens and had jobs.  He loved having us there to be with him at the end of the day.  He was lonely without us.

 

I was the closest to him as I didn’t mind getting dirty and would go with him whenever I could.  I would help him by handing him tools or doing whatever he asked.  I loved being outside.  I was not fond of being cooped up in the house and doing all of the work that was required to feed harvest hands, wash clothes on a wash board, and so forth.  We would ride along and he would point out the state of the various fields, whether they needed to be gone over to cut down some weeds, whether it was time to plant the wheat, whether he needed to get someone on the bind weed (he had a thing about bind weed), and whether it was time to call the harvesters.  He taught me to read the land and crops and love being outside.

 

He taught me to read the weather by the clouds, the smells in the air, the wind velocity, and by the birds and animals’ behavior.  He told me about the people who lived on the farms we would drive by.  He had what I called an “audio memory,” in that he remembered everything about the people, their parents, their background, their children, grandchildren which I considered remarkable.  In his generation he had to rely upon his memory and important information was passed by word of mouth.  His very livelihood depended upon him remembering the teachings of his Father and others about all the things involved in farming and living.  He taught me to listen and hear to what people were saying and feeling at a deeper level.

 

He went on to learn everything he could about new ways of farming and eventually had foreign farmers come to his farm to learn better farming methods.  He also went other countries to show farmers the new methods.  He was a simple man but had such vision where farming was concerned.  He was considered a Master Farmer in his generation.

 

There were seven years when he did not have a crop due to drought and he had to borrow money from the bank for us to live on.  My Mother, older sister and I all had to go to work to help the family make it through this time.  It was very hard on him and my Mother.  He paid every penny he borrowed back to the bank; he did not file bankruptcy or evade his debts in any way.  He was an honorable man with great strength of character.  He taught me to work together to keep the family together during good times and difficult times.  He taught me that love is more valuable than money.  He taught me to be responsible about paying my bills on time, and when I had to borrow money to work until I completely paid back the money I owed.

 

He was a religious man who went to church on Sunday, who helped his fellow farmers and their families when he could, and loved his close and extended family.  After he moved to Colorado, he would write and call his sisters every week and they did the same with him.  He taught me to stay connected with those I love.  He was a deeply loyal man, one who would be there for you.  He prayed at every meal, at bedtime and often.  He thanked “the Good Lord” for all his blessings and those of his family.  He taught me to pray for myself and all those around me.

 

He enjoyed a cocktail once in a while, but he was not a drinker.  He loved the wonderful food my Mother made for him and he was a man who did not leave anything on his plate.  He enjoyed having family and friends over to visit or play cards or just be together.  Mother made sure our home was open to welcome all with warmth, food, drink, and conversation.  Dad treated everyone the same no matter whether they were one of his employees or a high-level official from the Department of Agriculture.  He knew who he was inside himself.  He loved telling stories from years ago with whoever was visiting.  He loved interacting with family and friends, teaching me the value of enjoying everyone no matter their status in life and the simple joy of just being together with people.

 

He always bought Mother a dozed long-stemmed Red Roses for special occasions showing her his love for her.  He was generous with her and us in taking us on trips, buying us cars when the time came we needed them, taking us out to dinner, and bringing us gifts from his trips.  He loved our gifts to him and was appreciative of whatever we got for him.  He was affectionate and gave me hugs often.  He showed me how to give and how to receive love in all ways, not just materially.

 

There are three daughters in our family and each of us felt like we were his favorite.  This is a rare and precious gift to give your children, the feeling of equality of love.  He and I thought the most alike in business matters and later on in life in general.  He was a person I could tell exactly what I thought when I did not like something and he would talk with me about it.  He taught me respect for him and myself, to value my opinion and to stand up for myself.

 

When he got lost within himself, he found his way back through prayer and reading The Bible, and I am guessing talking with family and friends.  He would not have called himself a spiritual man, but I do as his spirit was so all-embracing that it uplifted those with whom he came in contact by his words and actions.

 

He comes to me in Spirit and guides me with his strength, his wisdom, his kindness, his simple ways, his thoughtfulness, and his abiding love for the path I am journeying.  I am so very grateful to have such a wonderful Father.  I send him all my love on Father’s Day and every day as he means the world to me and always will.

 

He loved dogs and cats.  Reggie and he would have had a wonderful time had they met in the physical.  They have a wonderful time in spirit as Reggie connects with him when he goes off in his dream time and at other times.  Nancy and Reggie♥