It occurs to me lately that “play” is something that I feel like I have lost touch with. Wiktionary has eleven meanings for play, but the only one that fit what I want is quoted: To act in a manner such that one has fun; to engage in activities expressly for the purpose of recreation or entertainment. It surprised me that this was such a mild description. In my mind, play was such an energetic, all encompassing, big concept that this caused me to revise my thinking about what play actually is.
It takes me back in time to when I felt like I stopped playing which was around the time my husband needed more care several years ago. I played a little during this time but it was with the thought in the back of my mind that I wondered if my husband was doing alright without me there. It wasn’t the free, openhearted play that is an innate part of me. Spirit was calling me to go to my inner world and find other parts of myself that were more important at that time.
After my husband died, no thought was given to play because I was grieving. It has been four years since he left and this past weekend I started thinking about really playing. With that thought came a stream of words and visions. What does play feel like to me now? I do not know. Along with that, came the word joy and the vision of me laughing and laughing at my little dog Reggie’s antics in the house, garden and car as I play with or watch him. Spirit was showing me where I was already playing with my little four-legged mate.
Next came a blank slate with nothing on it; just a pure white blank slate. More words came of things I do occasionally like go to the movies, go out to lunch, take a drive, go to an event, and so forth. These all make me feel happy, but they are not the spontaneous, free, openhearted play that I long for. Then came the vision of me dancing every Friday evening. When I dance, I am the dance floating across the floor, with the energy, vibration and frequency of the music infusing all aspects of my Beingness, and my feet lifting in joy with each step. Spirit is reflecting to me the degrees of play that I already have in my life from quiet joy with family and friends to spontaneous, free, openhearted movement dancing.
It opened me up to knowing I want all the play I have now, and more. More of that spontaneous, free, openhearted play that lifts me to another realm where I float free. It feels good to identify what I want more of now. Spirit will surprise me with what I want more of in ways that I do not anticipate or expect which will add to the joy of play. So, I will enjoy the play I have now and stay open to gifts from Spirit and others for more play.
Spirit also gave me the words along with the vision that now play is different for me, just as spontaneous, free and openhearted with the energy, vibration, and frequency appropriate for this time in my life, my body, and my lifestyle. Simultaneously, peace flowed into me as I felt Spirit’s truth.
Reggie plays every day as he chases squirrels, burrows through the bushes looking for wee ones, runs to the fence to greet the dogs on either side of his home, and brings his beloved stuffed lamb chop that Aunt Barbara gave him for me to play tug with. He doesn’t have to think about being spontaneous, free, or openhearted; that is how he lives. While he pulls and shakes his head trying to get it from me, he makes sounds like I do. I rough house with him lifting his 16-pound little body up and down, saying to him: You are such a rough little boy or you are just a little play baby, jumping up and down, playing with your Mommy. He even plays when he is sleeping as his little legs move like he is running outside. He makes me laugh which uplifts me to a high level of joy. How blessed we are to have Spirit bringing us play at the right and perfect time in the right and perfect way. Nancy and Reggie♥